Go the fuck to sleep


I discovered an epic bedtime story today which I’m sure every parent can lovingly relate to! When all else fails, maybe it’s time to read your sweet baby Go the Fuck to Sleep.

You can see what it’s all about here.

In actuality, staying up holding, rocking, snuggling, and doing whatever else I need to for my baby has truly been more joyful than I could have possibly imagined (even if it is difficult in a sleep-deprived haze), but there are those moments when it challenges you to really step it up a notch. I think this struck me particularly during one of the first couple nights which went something like this:

  • Wake up to screaming
  • Start feeding baby
  • Diaper fills with poop
  • Stop feeding and start changing diaper
  • As soon as second diaper is on, it fills with poop again
  • Start changing second diaper
  • Hands get blasted with poop mid-change
  • Put on a third diaper
  • Return to feeding
  • Just as baby is full and falling asleep, third diaper fills with poop (also waking baby)
  • Change third diaper
  • Baby is now awake, hungry, and fairly angry at all the interruption; start feeding again
  • Well after baby is asleep – and about to be put to bed – the ominous sound of more poop emanates from fourth diaper
  • Sit patiently, waiting, wondering what the longest reasonable timeout is before starting diaper five, virtually¬†guaranteeing¬†another reset

Of course, this gets way better once the baby is more than a few days old but other sleep obstacles still abound. Believe it or not it’s somehow still magical and entirely worth it. I may never read Cayden Go the Fuck to Sleep but I have newfound empathy for all the parents who go through ordeals like this for the love of their kids!

  1. #1 by auto ru on May 9, 2011 - 3:40 am

    Nice topic – respect !

  2. #2 by Daquan Stevens on May 10, 2011 - 12:22 pm

    Your web site (Go the fuck to sleep Life & Code) doesn’t display appropriately on my iphone – you might wanna try and change that :) Daquan Stevens

  3. #3 by j.knight on June 19, 2011 - 8:45 pm

    I GUESS THE WORLD HAS LOST IT’S MIND! to think this should be read to a child . when we are trying to keep them from using language like that ! even having Mr. Jackson reading it still makes it no better… Keep your coments to your self when it comes to children they arre like little spunges and say and learn everthing .If you can’t get your child to bed start earlier and “NO SUGAR”

  4. #4 by Dustin on July 7, 2011 - 11:20 pm

    It’s amazing that this is lost on so many people, but since I’ve heard this several times I’m compelled to respond: This is a children’s book for adults and the format is really part of the commentary. Taking it as a literal thing to read to your child is idiotic. A great explanation for those that need it is available here.

  5. #5 by Jason on July 16, 2011 - 2:54 pm

    I think you forget, “create some makeshift earplugs”, on your list

  6. #6 by Dustin on July 16, 2011 - 4:48 pm

    Hah, yeah it can get there sometimes!

  7. #7 by Justin on August 1, 2011 - 10:27 am

    Personally, I raise my children to know what is wrong, and not to do it, rather than relying on obscurity to keep them pointed in the right direction. My 5 year old knows EVERY curse word, and knows they will get her a spanking if I even hear about her saying them. I found “Go the Fuck to Sleep” entertaining for about 45 seconds… Then it became ineffective. It’s juvenile, redundant, and falls flat. I’ll admit I smiled, but not even as much as watching “Dumb and DumberER”. For shame Samuel, for shame.

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